End violence against everyone
Uterus: .....look I know I was 2 days early but hey! STILL NO BABY
Me: Fuck you.
Uterus: Wait. Are you about to sneeze?
Uterus: You look like you want to sneeze.
Me: N- *sneezes*
Uterus: I love all this. Here have some pelvic pain AND nausea. AND because you said 'Fuck you'? There. Go get a new pad. Fetch. BITCH.